A lot of couples go to therapy months or even years after they should have already been saying, “Okay, we’re fine.” But beneath that word often lives a complex stew of stress, unmet needs, emotional distance, or even hidden pain. If you are in a marriage, or engaged, or in a serious relationship, bypassing chronic marital problems can eventually begin to erode trust, intimacy, and communication.

At Leadership Empowerment and Psychological Services, LLC (LEAPS Inc.) in Orlando and Tampa, we help couples identify the root of their marital issues through marriage counseling and relationship assessments, enabling both individuals to live fulfilling and satisfying lives together. In this article, we’ll explore the key signs that suggest your relationship could benefit from professional guidance and why early support can make all the difference.

Why Relationship Assessment Should Come First

One of the first steps in our therapeutic process at LEAPS Inc. is conducting a relationship satisfaction assessment. This practice is scientifically supported and provides us with a way to measure each partner’s emotional, physical, and cognitive attachment to their relationship.

Studies have found that such early evaluation increases the effectiveness of treatment. In couples therapy, the utilization of a well-defined relationship assessment is directly related to therapeutic alliance and efficacy, as was found in Family Process (Roddy et al., 2019).

The assessment helps uncover:

• Levels of emotional fulfillment and connection 
• Patterns of communication 
• Stressors contributing to relationship dissatisfaction 
• Potential trauma histories influencing relational behavior 
• Conflicting values, goals, or family dynamics

Then, and only then, can we apply the most relevant interventions, which include Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), CBT, and Structural Family Therapy (SFT), for each couple.

1. Communication Has Broken Down

The inability to communicate without turning an exchange into an argument or an emotional withdrawal is one of the most frequent complaints of couples who come to therapy.

Signs include

• Frequent misunderstandings or defensiveness 
• One partner avoids conversations altogether. 
• Repeating the same arguments with no resolution 
• Feeling dismissed or invalidated

Therapies such as Emotionally Focused Therapy and culturally sensitive couple counseling focus not just on the communication at a behavioral level, but also at an emotional level, helping partners move from criticism and blame to understanding and validation.

2. Emotional or Physical Infidelity

It typically also addresses deep-seated unmet needs or issues within the relationship. If you have made a similar bond with someone else, we can now say that you are emotionally cheating. In contrast, if there are sexual actions done repeatedly with someone other than your partner, we can consider it as physical infidelity.

And in a study in the Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, couples who sought counseling after infidelity were more successful in the long run if both partners were invested in opening up and sharing more in the relationship.

Couples counseling can:

• Create a safe space to express pain and betrayal 
• Explore why the infidelity occurred 
• Rebuild emotional intimacy and trust 
• Set boundaries to protect the relationship moving forward

Therapies such as Internal Family Systems (IFS) and trauma-focused therapy can also support in healing from any attachment wounds or trauma responses that helped to perpetuate the affair.

3. Intimacy Feels Distant—Or Nonexistent

Emotional and physical intimacy can diminish over time due to life stressors, parenting responsibilities, or unresolved conflict. When intimacy disappears, it can make both partners feel lonely, even when they’re physically together.

Signs of diminishing intimacy include:

• Lack of physical affection or sexual connection 
• Feeling more like roommates than romantic partners 
• Avoiding vulnerable conversations

Therapies such as Attachment-Based Therapy, Integrative Therapy, and Person-Centered Therapy can help partners rediscover emotional safety, allowing intimacy to grow again.

4. You’re Stuck in a Cycle of Blame

Blame and defensiveness often create a toxic cycle that prevents real resolution. When each partner focuses more on what the other is doing wrong, neither feels heard or respected.

Examples of this cycle

• “You never listen to me.” 
• “You’re always overreacting.” 
• “This is just who I am—deal with it.”

Relational Therapy and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) are effective for helping couples recognize and change cognitive distortions, improve emotional regulation, and break this loop of negativity.

5. Past Trauma Is Affecting the Relationship

Unresolved trauma, whether from childhood, past relationships, or significant life events, can silently affect how we connect, trust, and respond in close relationships.

You may notice

• Overreacting to perceived rejection 
• Emotional shutdowns in moments of vulnerability 
• Constant fear of abandonment 
• Controlling behaviors rooted in fear

At LEAPS Inc., our highly skilled therapists provide trauma-informed treatment such as Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (TF-CBT), and Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT) to aid clients in transcending former traumas and to create a future that is rich with integrity and healthy relationships.

6. The Same Issues Keep Reappearing

Are you having the same fights, over money, for example, or parenting, or boundaries? It just means that the underlying cause is not properly remediated.

This is where SFBT and Motivational Interviewing come to the rescue, as they give couples a way of thinking about change that is specific and practical. Narrative Therapy can also assist in helping partners re-author the unhelpful stories they tell themselves about their relationship.

7. You Feel Solitary, Not Congregated

Forehead-in-a-Lonely-Hands There’s a pain to loneliness in a relationship that may be just as bad as a physical separation. You may feel that you’re doing all the emotional work in the relationship, or that you’re not on the same team anymore.

Couples counseling can reveal the origins of emotional disconnection and reconnect you to the partnership and belonging that first joined you as one.

Positive Psychology, along with Existential Therapy approaches, teaches couples to find meaning, shared goals, and practices of gratitude to reconnect with one another.

8. There’s a Major Life Transition

Events like moving, having a baby, transitioning careers, or coping with grief can disrupt even strong relationships. It is the case that stress responses lead to heightened strain and that the dynamics of roles in the relationship would also be affected.

Intervention Therapy and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) can provide couples with a sense of clarity and grounding as they navigate difficult phase transitions.

9. You’re Considering Divorce (or Separation)

A desire for a divorce does not necessarily mean that it is the right decision, just the right state of overwhelm. Marriage counseling gives couples a chance to make the choice … together. Perhaps most importantly, marriage counseling allows couples to make the decision of whether to try to rebuild their marriage or move on.

Reality Therapy, Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), and Marital and Family Therapy (MFT) strategies are all endeavors to develop strengths in the form of value-laden decision-making and communication skills that are the precursors to mutual understanding and the ability to make decisions about moving forward in the marriage.

10. One or Both Partners Are Struggling with Mental Health Issues

For partners to operate or support one another in specific ways may be because of mental health issues such as anxiety, depression, ptsd, or lingering stress. It will be worse not to face up to these things in the long run, especially in the context of conflict and pain.

So when you hire one of the trauma therapists or mental health counselors mentioned above who also practice couples therapy, you can work on both the relationship and your health at the same time.

Other forms of therapy, including DBT and CFT, may offer some benefits in helping to manage symptoms and fostering compassion and resilience within the partnership.

Marriage Counseling Is Not a Last Resort—It’s an Investment in Connection

The sooner you get help, the more choices and resources you will have for recovery. So much resentment accumulates between partners who fail to address issues. However, even then, change is possible when approached in the correct manner.

Using evidence-based, culturally and personally relatable interventions, Leadership Empowerment and Psychological Services, LLC provides genuine help and support to couples committed to reconnecting, rebuilding, or redefining their relationships.

Your Next Step Toward Healing

Is it time to talk to a marriage therapist?

If you recognize any of these signs in your relationship or even if you’re just unsure, consider starting with a relationship satisfaction assessment. At LEAPS Inc., we offer professional and compassionate therapy to individuals, couples, and families in Orlando and Tampa.

Visit www.leapsinc.com to learn more or schedule a confidential consultation. You don’t have to navigate this alone; real help is available.